


i think i'm gonna take the flight

by Thri_here



Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Fix-It of Sorts, Gen, Humor, Kurama's had enough of this talk-no-jutsu business, Madara's less of an ass, Old Uchiha Madara, Time Travel, more like implied Time Travel, probably because he can't talk over people, so he listens
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-07
Updated: 2020-11-07
Packaged: 2021-03-08 20:14:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,237
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27432586
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thri_here/pseuds/Thri_here
Summary: The man looks weird, he notes.With the wild mane of orange hair bordering Kushina-nee red and the reddest eyes he's ever seen. For a moment he thinks it's the Sharingan--but no, it's not the kind of red he sees in the mirror, it's darker, deeper and Obito wants it to get the fuck away from Guruguru or he'd rip it out.
Relationships: Kyuubi | Nine-tails | Kurama & Uchiha Madara, Kyuubi | Nine-tails | Kurama & Uchiha Obito, Tobi (Zetsu) | Guruguru & Kyuubi | Nine-tails |Kurama, Tobi (Zetsu) | Guruguru & Uchiha Obito, Uchiha Madara & Uchiha Obito, White Zetsu & Uchiha Obito
Comments: 11
Kudos: 79





	i think i'm gonna take the flight

**Author's Note:**

> this is unbeta'd and was catching dust in my folders so I thought, why not?
> 
> oh and its teen and up only because of the swearing. nothing graphic, really.

Obito is not having a good day.

  
Okay, it's been a long time since he's a had a Good Day, with Old man Madara screaming things about the World's Darkness (tm) and _blah blah blah_ \-- he really doesn't bother listening when the old guy's eyes glaze over, but he has to admit the whole thing with the First Hokage's kind of pitiful-- and the whiter Zetsu being the cheeky bastard he is, twisting out of walls.

  
But the point is, today is an exceptionally bad day.

  
One, he woke up on the bad side of the bed--or the altar or whatever the stony thing is. Two, Guruguru's a bastard and it's not because he has a grudge about the little shit poking his biceps and making him fall off the altar thing or anything-- it's because he brought over a mirror.

  
Obito knows he looks unimaginably ugly. Scarring tissue peeks out from his neck, the rest of it hidden by his dark cloak. The skin there is pasty pale--wrinkled and like pickled plum. That bastard had no business whipping out a mirror and confirming things for him. Even if he's the one who couldn't help but look.

  
There's no way Rin's agreeing on a date now.

  
Bakakashi will laugh, obviously.

  
But Obito misses them all the same.

  
Apparently, semi-dying does that to you. Kushina-nee-san, Sensei and Rin are a given but _Bakakashi_? That's a surprise.

  
Okay, maybe not _that_ far fetched with all the following-around he did back when he was little after Kakashi made them fish.

  
"Just so you know Guruguru, I wasn't stalking him." Obito huffs pointedly, stretching his arms in the hope of increased mobility this time, "Research purposes. How he was so strong and stuff."

  
Guruguru nods seriously and Obito puffs his chest at his understanding only for that idiot to ruin the moment with, "Good for you, Madara says there's a Mangekyo perfect for stalking or something."

  
Obito falls off the altar again before regaining his footing.

  
"I-I said I wasn't doing that! You're stupid!" he sputters, wrinkling his nose at his now limp right arm.

  
"I'm Tobi!" the other man(?) replies, in a tone like he would be blinking if he had eyes.

  
"No you're _stupid_ Guruguru--" Obito states matter-of-factly just as the boulder blocking the mouth of the cave explodes into a million pieces. The boy's mouth shut with an audible click, then falls open again, and his pointed index finger crooks.

  
The dust and smoke hides everything right in front of him, including Guruguru who was sitting right opposite to him when--

  
"Oh my God, Guruguru! You're not stupid you. are. _paste_!" Obito screeches, running--or limping to be exact--to the masked creature and trying his best to dig him out of the rock and debris. "Please don't be dead I jinxed something, oh Gods let him live-- " Obito panics because the last time he was in a cave it was not, not, _not_ good and now Guruguru's trapped--

  
He wipes his tears on the sleeve of the cloak and proceeds to break all his nails in an attempt of bulldozing through the rocks. There's something warm on his cheek, something tasting metallic--don't judge him, okay? He licks tears away sometimes-- and he doesn't want to waste time on it. What he _wants_ his Guruguru out of that gods-damned rock.

  
Obito's eyes snap upwards at the newest arrival of the cave. The man looks weird, he notes, with the wild mane of orange hair bordering Kushina-nee red and the reddest eyes he's ever seen. For a moment he thinks it's the Sharingan--but no, it's not the kind of red he sees in the mirror, it's darker, deeper and Obito wants it to get the fuck away from Guruguru or he'd rip it out.

  
"You!" Obito howls, standing up straight--an entity of half-rage and half-stupidity-- even when his right side isn't cooperating whatsoever, "What the hell are you doing here?"

  
The Uchiha doesn't register that the man might be his way out. How could he just waltz in and kill Guruguru like that? How _dare_ he kill the only person Obito had for five whole months?

  
Guruguru was his friend and now he's gone under a boulder with this man walking around like he wasn't there at all and all Obito can see is red.

  
_What if it was an accident? a voice sounding suspiciously like granny_ chides, _What if he sensed you? What if he's Konoha?_

  
And really, Obito wants to go back to everybody in Konoha because it must be horrible if this is how they felt. But Guruguru's here and Obito's always been a little of a fool--

  
For a moment they lock their gazes and Obito notices the slight shifting of his features like he doesn't want to look but is fighting for dominance. 

  
He wins.

  
Not because Obito stops seeing things in red. Not because anything is lesser in clarity. But because granny's voice in his head wins over everything. 

  
He...could be from Konoha.

  
"I'm _coming_ for you, brat." the man in orange smiles, but it's mostly a snarl, "I'm coming for you."

  
It takes a second to compose himself. The rule is that shinobi must never show emotions. He doesn't agree--not exactly--but that idiot has a point about clouded judgment or whatever.

  
It takes another second to notice the hand on his right shoulder and flinch.

  
His head whips around and--

  
"Guruguru!" Obito claps a hand to his mouth, world disappearing into a haze somehow, "You're alive!"

  
The man in question tilts his head as if to ask why he wouldn't be.

  
"Rocks, you idiot! You were paste for a second." the Uchiha dabs at the moisture in his eyes to maintain some of his dignity, "Or I thought."

  
Guruguru just snorts, pointing at Obito's palms.

  
They've come away soaked in crimson.

  
"Wha--"

  
"Mangekyo. The Geezer talks." Guruguru says.

  
"Oh." Obito blinks. "Okay."

  
He can't say anything else at the moment. Just. What.

  
Explosions crash through his thoughts, resounds through the cave and there's the distinct smell of something on smoke. The embers are more than enough testimony with the obvious smoldering of the Uchiha-specific Katon Jutsu.

  
"Who are you?" somebody rasps weakly, "What do you seek?"

  
Somebody else claps from the other side of the cave, then mocks and laughs, making Obito's hair stand up. There's talking and--

  
Wait a minute, that way was--

  
"Old Man Madara!" Obito calls out in panic.

  
He didn't like the Old man most of the time, but he's never _hated_ people. And he sure as hell didn't want people dying in front of him--even if 'people' entailed crazy Konoha Founder who sicced the Kyuubi on the village some years ago. 

  
The cave is spacious where Obito's altar-stone--to-makeshift-bed is. Running further into its mouth is when it takes a sharp turn, making it narrower and more like a tunnel.

Apparently Old Geezers like spending time all broody (okay, maybe that's a clan thing) so the old man never gets out of that little hole of a tunnel.

  
_Now he must know how stupidly inconvenient it is_ , Obito curses, almost tripping over the long, dark robes with Guruguru falling into pace beside him, How the hell are people s'posed to reach him?

  
Obito halts.

  
The tunnel looks small. But _oh_ it's not. It branches into lefts and rights, the rocky ceilings suddenly giving into _wider_ , longer earthy ceilings. It would take some time to spot the Old man if there were no sparks from Fire Jutsus and--Obito squints--something....orange?

  
It suits Orange's persona-- the chakra surrounding him--all foul, just like that stupid snarl--and a little chilling, making the hair on the back of Obito's neck stand up again.

  
"W-What are you?" Obito demands although it comes out alarmingly shaky.

  
The man whirls around in one circular motion and flashes a grin with way too many teeth. 

  
Maybe, if Old man Madara is any younger, he would have scoffed at the man's incompetence in taking him out. Then aimed for a clean hit to his chest with a simple Katon. But Madara is not younger, and he can barely stand on his legs for a second more. His knees give out and Obito jerks forward to help him stand--

  
And he would have reached if there was no Orange standing between them.

  
"What do you want?" Obito tries again, this time with more composure (which, admittedly, is not much) and Guruguru at his back. Whoever he is, he has some chakra. Some foul, bad, vaguely familiar chakra, but impressive chakra nevertheless.

  
The man smirks, easy and hands--are those claws?!- tucked into pockets, rocking over the balls of his feet and says, "Stay down kid, not gonna kill you."

  
His eyes though. They look everywhere but the younger Uchiha's eyes.

  
Obito has never been the most perceptive person out there--that, he begrudgingly admits, goes to Rin, Bakakshi or maybe Anko with her eye for crazy poisons and crazier traps she pranks him with--but it's obvious with the guy avoiding his eyes that he doesn't like Obito looking straight at it.

  
Perks of having a sharingan, Obito guesses.

  
"Look, Orange!" he calls out to the man now standing to Madara's left.

  
The man stills, claws out, but mouth slack.

  
"--Orange?!" orange yells, affronted, "It's Kurama The Great to you, brat."

  
Obito squints at his orange hair (which is kind of pretty, now that he's paying attention), orange sandals, and tattered orange jacket very pointedly before huffing.

  
"You have a lot of Orange on you though," Madara manages without coughing, conversationally, self-preservation skills zero. Does he _want_ to die?

  
Obito snickers along though, and he can feel Kakashi laughing from miles away in his nice apartment in Konoha at Obito of all people making fun of people for wearing Orange.

  
"Why are you killing him?" Obito lets out and winces at his own words. Shouldn't it be _why are you trying to kill him_ , but technically _Madara's sorta dying and oh shit--that's bad--"_ You can't kill him!" he says, with a little more conviction.

  
The man's smirk falls and his eyes narrow. Claws still out, he maneuvers his hair into a messy bun.

  
"That's too bad kid, this one's gotta go so gotta knock you out." he says breezily as if talking about the weather, "Don't look at me that, urgh, I don't like you Uchiha either. It's all that brat saying dumb stuff 'bout you guys being the same before and all that shit."

  
Obito has _no_ idea what's happening, but it's keeping them all in one piece and alive, so he opens up another conversation, "Why don't you like the Uchiha?" he says, and no, he is not pouting with his acknowledgment complex--just, conversational. And being interesting. 

  
Kurara looks more beast than man when taken aback. Almost comical, with his hair sticking out in messy strands and scarlet eyes wide.

  
"I see the similarities with the stupid opening-talk for the talking it out crap, brat," Kurara barks--no wait, that's him laughing, one claw getting ready to strike, "But Uchiha," he says, eyes shifting to Madara, "Uchiha here's gotta go."

  
The way he says _Uchiha_ is how Rin would say _tomatoes_.

  
Which is something sweet, nice, Rin would set fire to.

  
"You're killing him just because he's Uchiha?" Obito verbalizes disbelievingly, and he wonders if this guy is an idiot. Because he's pretty sure _he's_ Uchiha with the Sharingan and all too. And Kurara just said he _wouldn't_ kill Obito.

  
Nobody has the Sharingan except the Uchiha, right? (Except Bakakashi but he's got old man hair and no Uchiha has old man hair that young so no one will see)

  
Kurara gives him a look reminiscent of Rin like _Obito's_ the one who hasn't separated his wrapper from the gum yet (it was only one time, okay?), and maybe he is. He just doesn't understand why anybody would try to kill an old man so frail.

  
What could he possibly do? _Level the world with meteors?_

  
"Kid, I fucking hate you Uchiha but I'm not gonna waste my breath explaining things to you," he says, then mutters under his breath, "Don't want you changing my mind with that weird talking thing."

  
Somebody clears his voice.

  
"All I want is world peace." Madara croaks from where he is. "I see that you know far too much. You can't comprehend a genjutsu cast on the Moon? Your moral implications are nothing but an illusion!"

  
Talking! Tactical, see? Drawing things out? 

  
"Geezer, genjutsu's the illusion. You starve if you live it." Because he's an idiot Obito doesn't let the geezer talk, go for _plan: draw things out_ , and says dryly, "The earth's round you idiot, how's that world peace if the moon can't rea--" And he was going to explain because clearly, the old man's never went to the academy because that was the first thing they taught in theory--

  
when the blacker Zetsu lunges forward from the shadows behind Old man Madara with a cry that sounded suspiciously like _Mother! My chance to reviving mother!_

  
Surprisingly, he...doesn't panic. Doesn't move at all.

  
Obito's pretty bummed for a second that his last thoughts before Zetsu kills him or whatever would be about Blackie being a momma's boy. That is not how he wanted his last thoughts to go, but maybe that was fine with his official last words being "Protect Rin."

  
Or was it "Take my eyes?' 

  
Oh shit.

  
Obito fervently hopes it's the former because the latter sounds morbid. Very, very morbid, like those terrible horror flicks (which his traitorous tear glands shed for too) Sensei likes but is still a little scared of himself.

  
It's after a while when he hears Kurara's pained growl of _"Can't kill that too?!_ " that he realizes that one, _oh I'm not dead_ and two, _oh someone else is going to be._

  
Guruguru that little piece of shit--the bastard that ruined his day with the mirror-- was ruining his day again, wrestling Zetsu right in front of Obito. 

  
Why is everyone in his life such self-sacrificing bleeding hearts?

  
That's him being dramatic, obviously, Obito scoffs, holding a sniffle in.

  
Something burns behind his eyes at Zetsu slipping into the Earth, leaving Guruguru on the floor like the idiot he is.

  
Nobody's been self-sacrificing idiots in his life for Obito--maybe his team would be, could be--but right now Guruguru _is_ , and he's not letting Blackie go.  
Seemingly sharing his thoughts on Blackie, Kurara leaps forward snarling about _somebody I can kill!_ warps the creature's neck to sides previously impossible with sharp claws when--

  
Zetsu disappears.

  
Obito curses under his breath.

  
He doesn't know why Blackie gives him bad vibes, he just does and he needed to go right then but--

  
Orange's face is contorted into a feral grimace. He gathers some of the orange locks spilling from the bun and pins it closer to his scalp in a deadly motion, and says _pleadingly_ (?), " _Why_."

  
And he's looking at Obito.

  
"...What." he manages, in the middle of checking on Guruguru. Fortunately, he not so much of an ass to die on Obito.

  
"Kamui," Madara's voice grates at his throat across them. "Impressive."

  
Obito tilts his head.

  
"Stalking, kid!" Guruguru squeaks from where he's sprawled on the floor with Obito's palm to his chest. And Obito doesn't think about what it says about him if he has a stalking Mangekyo. Or what exactly he did to Blackie. That's for later.

  
"..mangekyo?" he says slowly, liquid dripping down his cheeks, "Mangekyo..."

  
Then he remembers that however cool mangekyo powers are, there's still the issue of Orange murdering the Old man.

  
"Look Karura the Great, " Obito clears his throat very bravely, only to be very rudely interrupted.

  
Kurara looks even more affronted if possible, hair sentient enough (which oddly reminds him of Old Man Madara) to stand up in indignation, "Ku-ra-ma." he says long-sufferingly as if he's put up with Obito for more than a lifetime than, say, fifteen minutes.

  
"Whyddyou wanna kill the Old man for being an Uchiha?" Obito asks suddenly changing the subject, then says very intelligently, "That thing's called bigotry or something you know."

  
"Stupid Idiot!" Kurama screeches, (which means bigotry _isn't_ an intelligent word--damn that Bakakashi) pointing fingers everywhere "He was gonna kill your friend! He put seals on your stupid heart!"

  
" _Who_ he?" he asks then feels even stupider, so he adds to sound more in the know, "I mean, why should he kill my friends?!" 

  
"Oh," Madara snorts bordering a grimace, "You know about Zetsu's plans for the little brat too."

  
"Zetsu planned to kill my _friends_?" Obito shouts incredulously, then his eyebrows disappear into his hairline when he recalls Blackie being a momma's boy and saying something about revivals, "For his _mom_? _What_?"

  
Kurama tilts his head towards the heavens (or the cave ceiling), closes his eyes, takes a deep breath, and spreads his hands as if in prayer, fingers twitching. Finally, he walks over to Old man Madara who probably can't even manage a small Katon and grabs him by the collar.

  
"This piece of trash, wanted a genjutsu world." Kurama says, slowly, but not losing the dangerous edge in his voice.

  
The younger Uchiha's brows just furrow.

  
"Yeah, I heard him." Obito shakes his head, "Poor guy likes to dream."

  
There's a squeak of protest from the geezer but everybody ignores that. His throat is probably too charred to speak.

  
"He can do it." Kurama grunts in exasperation, index finger and thumb on the bridge of his nose, "He can make a fucking genjutsu world. Cast a genjutsu on the moon--you have genjutsu worlds. Zetsu wants his mommy Kaguya back. Pulling strings. You get me, brat?"

  
No, Obito does _not_ get it.

  
So with all the eloquence of a dignified Uchiha of thirteen-years, Obito says, "What the _fuck_?"

  
What _cult_ is this Zetsu from? Obito shudders.  
  


Old man Madara laughs--a splintered, dejected sound, "A Perfect World, where there's no war. You've destroyed something great, brats."

  
Kurama scoffs and unclenches his fingers. The Older Uchiha is left in the ground in an unseeming thud.

  
He doesn't try to get up.

  
"Old Man Madara?" Obito calls. "What do you mean Perfect world?"

  
Guruguru dusts himself and wraps one leg over the other on the ground as if getting ready for a movie.

  
"Zetsu showed me a way to have the Perfect World--a world where nobody needs to die, a world with no war," Madara replies, voice cracking, "A word where you don't have to fight and lose siblings."

  
Kurama's eyes shoot open and horror washes over his face. He picks the old man back up on his feet again, hands tightening around his cloak's collar.

  
"No!" he shrieks, alarmed, "He can't talk!"

  
Old man Madara ignores him and continues, "It would have been perfect. No kids tripping over their own feet on battlefields. All I wanted--"

  
" _No_!" Kurama interrupts, ruining the moment. "NO NO NO!"

  
Obito ignores him and says, "But Zetsu...said something about Kaguya lady."

  
"I see that he is not my will." Madara grimaces. "I am old, there's nothing more for me to do."

  
Orange flounders in the background with Guruguru trying to have him unhand the Old man. "Of course he's not!" Kurama snarls, "That piece of shit was gonna turn everyone in your dumb dream into Zetsus to get that bitch Kaguya back."

  
Madara screws his eyes shut.

  
"I see that...I was used."

  
Kurama stops struggling against Guruguru hold, his hands following to his side in lost hope.

  
He says weakly, "...Why are you _believing_ me, bastard? I fucking hate you."

  
The older Uchiha coughs out that laugh again. It's a weak attempt at pride, but Obito sees dejection and it's lost. "You aren't even arguing about free-will or any of the arguments I've had with Izuna in my head." he continues, laughter grating at his throat, "What reason do you have to lie knowing everything? Kaguya must be the mother--"

  
_Drama runs in the family_ , Obito thinks, rolling his eyes. _Shisui was crying about dying when his favorite teacup broke too._

"Old man Madara," Obito cuts in determinedly. "It's gonna be okay."

Madara's eyes widen a fraction, then his brows furrow.

  
"I don't need your empty assurances, brat," the asshole spits, but Obito smiles faintly, hearing amusement there. Better than lost.

  
" _No_!" Kurama screams in agony only to be ignored."Don't talk to him!"

  
"They aren't, geezer," Obito grins, and he's sure that Madara's family now. All of them such _kids_. " Empty words, I mean. You find your thing if you're living, you know? Even if this--uh--dream thing's not working out."

  
Madara doesn't say anything back.

Nothing (except Kurama's face paling alarmingly) happens for one second after which Madara finally half-scoffs, "My thing now seems to be getting a seal off you, brat."

  
Guruguru helps Kurama sink to floor.

  
A bit of stone brushes Obito's cheek, making him turn his gaze upwards. Slight tremors run through the rocky ceiling, shaking the icicle-sharp-looking rocks. 

  
He winces.

  
It was obvious the cave wouldn't withstand orange's fight--

  
Anguished cries of NO distract Obito from the state of the cave.

  
Obito inches closer to Kurama who has his head in his arms, almost poking him with an experimental toe, when he's leveled with a glare. 

" _Why_." the man in question practically wails, face buried in his knees, "What am I supposed to kill??"

  
Again, Obito has no idea what's happening, so he pats him on the shoulder in what is a hopefully soothing voice, "There, there."

Kurama suddenly tenses, though Obito can see no reason why. Nothing out of the ordinary. Okay cave, okay ground, swirly cave wall--

wait, what?

  
The whiter Zetsu walks into the room, throwing his cloak off.

  
"Get this, I was stalking the kids for--" he begins, then takes in old man Madara on the floor, panting, a man with claws on his knees crying and Guruguru comforting him.  
He blinks once. Then twice.

  
"What the _fuck_ , kid?" he says, mirroring Obito's earlier sentiments.

  
Obito shrugs. "Blackie wanted to bring his mommy back. He was using you guys, I guess."

  
White Zetsu opts to move further away from Orange to digest the information, lip curled in a _what_ , well and away from the crying.

  
Kurama doesn't take the newest arrival of the room well.

  
"Those swirly things're on your side, you say Madara's okay, _who should I kill_?" Kurama cries dramatically again and Obito pauses to see if he's related to Kushina-nee. That particular flair of ruthless drama belonged there.

  
"Why can't _one_ person not have a sob story??" he groans and laments, fixing Madara with one of his glares, "Why can't _one_ person be a murderer without the universe pushing them to be?! You're all fucking ninjas for God's sake! Why aren't _you_ trying anything?"

  
Obito could almost imagine Kurama with Kushina-nee's _How DARE you not be a mass murderer?_ scowl.

  
Madara rearranges himself into a more comfortable position, legs unbent, and suggests breezily, "There's Black Zetsu? Clan Records say Kamui's another dimension."

  
All the tension leaves Kurama's muscles at these words. He transforms in a split second; rolls his shoulders, fixes his hair, and springs his claws out.

  
" _Finally_. And I'm not talking to that fucker." he snarls, brushing Guruguru's hand away from his shoulders. Obito winces slightly that his personal snarling quota's not done for the day at all, especially with those filed canines--God, what did he do to his teeth? "Do that thing with your creepy eyes, kid."

  
Obito has _no_ idea what's happening for the millionth time, but Kurama should probably know what he's doing with Obito's Sharingan. Because Obito sure as hell doesn't. So he strains at his tear glands--because that's how the Sharingan works most of the time--and a chasm cracks open. 

  
The warp takes not only Kurama (who falls into it mumbling about _not gonna open my mouth_ and _fucker better not have sob stories_ ), but Guruguru and Zetsu too, who wave reluctantly. Obito cheerfully waves back, silently hoping that he can fish them out of wherever he sent them.

  
Orange need back-up for Blackie, right?

  
There's another mini-quake, and Obito doesn't waste time in helping Madara to his feet. He hauls one of the old man's arms onto his functioning shoulder, adjusts his cloak while trudging away to the cave exit.

  
"Where to?" he hears Old Man Madara croak.

  
_To Kouka-Oba's confectionary_ , his mind supplies, but Old Man Madara wouldn't know where that is. _To his team_ , he wants to say, but Madara doesn't know them. _To little Shisui and littler Itachi who he babysits_ , he wants to say, but Madara doesn't know them either, even if they're family.

  
So he settles for, "Anywhere with better clothes, Geezer."

  
It's definitely not his acknowledgment complex, okay? Or his _issues with family,_ like Rin puts commiseratingly. But maybe.

  
Maybe his dad's old high collared blues would fit this guy.

  
Sunlight through the canopy of trees screaming _borders of Konoha_ hits his scars, his face for the first time in forever, and--

  
Obito smiles at the gold and greens, not bothering to hold his sniffles in, drinking in the sun.

  
He might be having a slightly better day.

**Author's Note:**

> ik time-travel kurama bursting through rocks is not a new concept but i love it when he's terrified of talk no jutsu lmao


End file.
